


In Too Deep

by zinniaviolacacea



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Drowning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-03
Updated: 2016-12-03
Packaged: 2018-09-06 05:09:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8736079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zinniaviolacacea/pseuds/zinniaviolacacea
Summary: Saeyoung is drowning and he doesn't know why.





	

Saeyoung was drowning. He was drifting beneath the water, helpless. He was trying not to breath, really he was. But it’s hard when you can feel the water start to press down on you.

Maybe he should count how long until he drifts away.

How long can you stay awake without breathing? How much longer after that can you stay alive? Drowning is slow but it takes time. It was panicking and numbness and slowly losing consciousness. Is this how a nightmare would play out in real life? He wanted to stay alive just a bit longer, but also, he wanted to fade away into nothingness.

He was trying not to panic. He was trying to stay still. You can’t easily hold your breath when you can feel yourself slowly floating downwards, helpless to the pull of gravity. It’s always there even if everything feels different underwater. Floating down here is almost calming, if it wasn’t for the breathlessness he was feeling he might have even slept. If he inhales the water he’ll end up having more water than oxygen and that couldn’t ever be healthy for his lungs. Desperation starts making its way down his throat. If he inhaled things would definitely get even worse. If anything can really can get much worse when you’re floating lower and lower by the second.

It was hard. Trying to think of how to swim back up while keeping himself calm was no easy feat. He didn’t know if he even wanted to be alive. Maybe he didn’t want to die down here but it doesn’t look like he has much of a choice. Where do you find hope in a helpless situation. Tamping down his panic makes him want to either scream and cry or shut down. He’s unsure if he can spare enough energy to do either.

How do you calm yourself when you might die? Breathing exercises could’ve possibly helped if it wasn’t for the fact that he’s underwater. Even a gasp of breath could mean the start of the end. One inhale and the water will enter your lungs. Do you think of how to survive in this situation or should you accept it? How do you live when a part of you wants to die? How do you die when a part of you wants to live?

Who would even miss him when he’s gone? Everything in his life will always be temporary, no matter what. Nothing can ever last. Maybe some can hold out longer than others but they will all disappear one day. Like sand pouring down his hands onto a rocky beach. Spreading out, making it impossible to collect the same exact ones as before ever again. Everything that meant something to him was either gone or somewhere he couldn’t reach or find, untouchable. It was almost like a painting or statue straight from a museum.

Is this fading into numbness? The feeling of too much and too little. Of being consumed by panic and apathy. Feeling these emotions deeply yet also like they are something far away from you. Almost as if they’re happening to another person right in front of you. You can feel nausea creeping up your throat yet your mind stays still. Shall this disappear too? Will he follow after? Watching everything else drift out of reach, bubbles floating up to meet the sky. How will he slip out?

He takes a deep breath.

**Author's Note:**

> That feels when ur friend tells u to write a story about her bae and ur like k and then u kill em


End file.
